Bumbai Signs as LD; Bonjour Moved More Than His Legs in the Offseason

With the absence of Jacques Bonjour in the September 2013 season, the Canadian Cowboys needed someone to step up and replace him as the defensive core of the team. The Cowboys looked to the minors with very little luck. Surprisingly, the Cowboys would find their new defensive superstar in their already stellar RW Brother Bumbai (Burlington, ON.).

Bumbai would offer to play a few games as LD, having played with Jacques in several of their 2013 playoff series' with great success. After a couple of games, the Cowboys realized they had found their star. Brother Bumbai has since been featured as the new star defensive player for the once bilingual back-end.

"Nobody could replace Bonjour. Nobody. Ever." says fan Andrew Hendry.

Although this fan's comment was met with great support initially, it has been increasingly untrue. Bumbai has taken his slippery dangles from the front half of the ice and moved them to the back end - something Jacques Bonjour considered his one weakness as an offensive defenseman.

It did not take long for the news to travel to the Bonjour residence in Montreal. During his offseason break, and with the delivery of the news that there was a new offensive d-man in the Saddledome, Bonjour began to change his practices and, consequently, his overall style of play. The once 5'10, 175lb offensive defenseman has been training with Shea Weber of the NHL's Nashville Predators. Jacques has been able to increase his body weight over 20lbs in the offseason and according to one EASHL scout, it shows both in his physique and his style of play.

"J seems to be going for the big hits a lot more often. His poke checks are just as good as ever, he's just a more intimidating force, taking the body. I think combining Jacques and Bumbai will be lethal. LEEEThal."

Jacques Bonjour preparing for his official debut on October 16, 2013.

Combining the offensive dekes and accurate snipes of a veteran forward such as Bumbai with the defensive prowess and  big hits that the new Bonjour allegedly has to offer, the Canadian Cowboys may be able to advance their rating to a tier 1 team by the end of November 2013.

"We have an incredibly strong offensive core in Mittens, Beansqueeze, Friendship Casserole and the boys" commented the Captain. "We have always had a strong defense to compliment it. And with the addition of Zinga and Weber to the front end, we could afford to have one of our big three forwards move to the back side and really give the team that finishing touch. I think the fans are ready for a top tier team - and we're ready to give them what they want.

Canadian Cowboys Sign Michael Weber (LW) and Josh Zinga (C)

The Canadian Cowboys have their fair share of EASHL Veteran forwards on their team. But the Cowboys GM had the opportunity to sign two more and capitalized. Josh Zinga (Burlington, ON) is beginning his third consecutive year in the EASHL. Zinga previously played for an Amateur league team; having great success there, Zinga was ready to move up in the ranks to the Elite division with the Candian Cowboys.

"I just thought that it wasn't fair for me to be so soupy slammy in the Amateur league" commented Zinga. "I figured it was time for a new challenge, and I think the Cowboys are a great group of guys to do that with."

Michael Weber, hailing from Georgetown, Ontario (where, as the diehard fans will know, is a breeding ground for outstanding EASHL talent), is making his EASHL debut with the Cowboys. Weber has been performing at Elite-League levels in his personal career and when he was offered a contract with the Canadian Cowboys, Weber felt that it was a good fit for him.

"At this point in my career, I think the Cowboys are a great fit. We'll see where it takes me anyways. GO LEAFS." said Weber, seemingly distracted by their recent preseason victory over their NHL rival, the Ottawa Senators.

Zinga and Weber have already begun to put up big numbers for the Cowboys, and Captain Charlie Little (Georgetown, ON) hopes to see them grow into an inseparable cog in the Cowboy machine.

Updates to the Canadian Cowboy Roster page, along with the up-to-the-minute stats will reflect these additions on Sunday night at 11:59 EST.

Media Hit Catches Jacques Bonjour Warming-up for EASHL Action Thursday Night

Some players like to hit the ice for a mid-day skate a few hours before the big game. Some players like to lift weights and perform light cardio the morning of. But some players - the most elite players - warm up in another league. Last night, Jacques Bonjour (Quebec, ON) was seen by EASHL media reporters warming up for tonight`s action with his early-days QMJHL team of 5 years past: the Gatineau Olympiques.

Despite being leagues ahead of the minor league 17-18 year olds, Jacques Bonjour was revered in his home town, making his first appearance in Gatineau since 2008. The crowd was hot, cheering old-time chants such as "J'adore Bonjour!" and "Comment-ca-va!?" repeatedly each time Bonjour stepped onto the ice.

Jacques Bonjour making quick work of 18 year old Jean-Baptise Bourgeux

Olympiques GM Benoit Groulx organized a jersey-raising ceremony for the return of their most legendary defenseman. Fans were cheering. Girls were crying. Bonjour was home.



During his season in Gatineu, Bonjour was able to net 87G (an Olympiques record for a defensive player) and an astonishing 120 assists (another record for the Olympiques). Bonjours hits were also astonishing considering his small 5'9 stature. Weighing only 175lbs, Bonjour was able to lay over 200 hits in his single season as an Olympique.

Despite his defensive prowess and obvious advantage over his fellow ice-mates, Bonjour was modest about his near-legendary status. In his post-game interview, Jacques briefly commented on his elation about being back on the ice, and continued to the dressing room.

Jacques Bonjour leveling 17 year old André Giroux in last night`s game

Defensive partner Erique Butet was honored to have the privilege of playing with Bonjour on his line.

"Je suis....ahhh il est....il n'y est pas des mots. Bonjour est la meilleur. Il est un legende en Gatineu."

"C'etaient fantastique!" said one fan outside the arena after the Olympiques dominated their opponents in a 5-3 comeback win.

Jacques Bonjour returns to EASHL Canadian Cowboy action tonight at 8PM EST.

Jacques set to say Bonjour to the Action September 13, 2013

The Canadian Cowboys have had a seemingly great start to the 2014 year. Being ranked 92nd overall in the world is not something every club can say they have accomplished - especially so early in the new year. More astonishing is their ability to do so missing a key cog in their defensive machine. Jacques Bonjour (Montreal, QC) has been missing from Cowboy action since late July. He has been missed, but the Cowboys have been able to step up in his absence and fill his place adequately. Players including Slick Rick (Halifax, NS), Brother Bumbai (Burlington, ON) and Bean Bag (Burlington, ON) have shown their prowess on the other side of the puck. Despite their incredible performance, recent media reports suggest that the veteran defenseman is ready for action yet again - and just in time, too. With his teammates progressing through the ladders of experience, Bonjour has felt behind in the times.

Despite his presence in the virtual arena, Jacques Bonjour has been training hard on the streets of L.A. with sports greats such as Xhibit, Randy Moss, and Daunte Culpepper, and has never felt better about his physique. In a recent interview, Jacques seemed more than enthusiastic to get back into the locker room.

Jacques Bonjour will be back in action Friday night as the Cowboys face some of their toughest opponents of the September 2013 season.

Day 2 - A Rollercoaster Ride - Saturday, September 8th Recap

Magoo checks to see if his shot found the back of the net.

Day 2 of the Canadian Cowboys NHL 14 careers had many ups and downs for the team. Big winning streaks were followed by losing streaks. High scoring games were followed by shutouts. Let's take a look at what the Cowboys accomplished throughout yesterdays games:

Game 1: 5-2 WIN! Ben starts it all with a nice snipe. Reachs 10 careers goals and 30 career points. Magic gets confused and claps one into his own net. The Five Minute Majors hit the Cowboys 48 times and managed to injure Dusty Skater 5 separate times (mostly on interference hits). 5/11 on the PP
3 STARS: 2) Magic 1G 3A 12 Hits     1)Bumbai 3G 2A

Game 2: 2-1 WIN! Ben scores the 1st goal again and stays on fire (4Gs in 2 games).
3 STARS: 2) Magic 1G     1) Bumbai 1G 1A

Game 3: 3-0 WIN! Michael the Magic records his first NHL 14 Hat-Trick!
3 STARS: 2) Bumbai 3A    1) Magic 3G 8Hits

Game 4: 5-3 WIN! Michael the Magic records a 2nd straight Hat-Trick!!
3 STARS: 3)Magoo 1G 1A 12Hits   2)Dusty 4A (record)   1)Magic 3G  2A

4 Game Winning Streak!!! Bumbai with 4G 8A. Magic with 8G 5A.

Game 5: 1-0 LOSS. COOKES DEBUT!!! Dusty Skater wins his 1st fight. Magic suffers a broken jaw for 2nd straight game. Froggy Fresh with 5 big hits in his first career game.

Game 6: 4-3 WIN! Froggy Fresh gets 1st career goal and assist!
3 STARS: 2) Dusty 1G 2A   1) Magic 2G 1A 12Hits

Game 7: 2-1 LOSS. Bumbai sends player to hospital with hit from behind. 5 minute game misconduct. Canadian Cowboys manage 30 hits in the game. Bumbai 8 hits. Dusty 6 hits. Magic 8 hits.

Game 8: 4-1 LOSS. Froggy Fresh shows the toughness he adds to the Cowboys and stands up for Michael the Magic after he gets crushed. Wins his 1st NHL 14 fight. Froggy would later fight again and lose against a complete mangler, Bumbai would start at fight at the same time and get knocked out.

Game 9: 4-1 LOSS. Outshot opponents 31-15...

Canadian Cowboys lose 4 of last 5 games. Manage only 3 goals in 4 losses.

Game 10: 2-0 WIN! Veteran line of Magic, Skater and Bumbai dominate for the win. Nick takes over on defense and brings some much needed solid play.
3 STARS: 3) Bumbai 2A   2) Dusty 1G 1A   1) Magic 1G 1A 11Hits

Game 11: 3-0 WIN! Beanbag comes up big with 2 goals! 1 goal an absolute laser one-timer right under the bar. Canadian Cowboys at this point had a record of 18-9-2. Division 7. Rank 109.
3 STARS: 3) Bumbai 2A   2) Bean 2G   1) Magic 1G 1A

Game 12: 3-0 WIN! Ben and Nick both win fights that breakout at the same time! Outshot opponents 25-9 and maintained a passing percentage of 72%
3 STARS: 3) Bumbai 2A   2) Magic 2G   1) Dusty 1G 2A

Game 13: 2-1 WIN! Bumbai scores with just more than a minute left to win the game.
3 STARS: 2) Dusty 1G   1) Bumbai 1G 1A

4 game winning streak!!! Beanbags addition leads to 3 straight shutouts and only 1 goal allowed in 4 games. Bumbai with 1 G 7 A in 4 games. 

Game 14: 4-1 LOSS...

Game 15: 4-1 LOSS.. Bumbai hits 50 career points.

Game 16: 2-0 LOSS against Frenchies. Dusty wins fight with major uppercut punches. Outshot opponents 19-14 and a passing percentage of 62%.

Game 17: 3-1 LOSS.. 4 fights go down all at once!!! All Cowboys get owned except for Froggy Fresh.

Ugly 4 game losing streak... Cowboys fail to generate much offense with only 3 goals in 4 games.

Game 18: 1-0 PLAYOFF WIN! Froggy Fresh gets the Game Winning Goal.

Canadian Cowboys Record: 20-13-2   Division 6.

Which moment is wetter?

Bumbai head first dive sends opponent to hospital

OR

Beanbag shows his extreme hate for Frenchies. (Hi Ben!)

Who's That Psycho Guy?

C - Dusty Skater - Veteran Canadian Cowboy

The Canadian Cowboys are almost 2 full days into their NHL 14 careers and a big part of their team is this man here, Dusty Skater. You may be asking yourself, "This guy plays hockey? He looks like he would murder my family."
Sure, Dusty Skater is a very scary looking guy, but he's actually a very fun-loving, respectable guy. He always tries his hardest when he steps on the ice. He has elite poke checking skills, loves to win faceoffs, and always seems to score at the most clutch moments. He's been a big anchor at his centre position for the Cowboys for many years and without him the Cowboys wouldn't be as successful as a team.
So next time you decide to judge a book by its cover. Stop for a second and maybe take the time to open up the book first.
Thanks for reading todays edition of : Who's that Cowboy? (brought to you by Mio Squirt)

Next time find out who that mean looking RW is!

YEEEEHAW! NHL 14 has begun!!! Friday, September 6th RECAP

After a very short offseason the Cowboys took the ice for the beginning of their NHL 14 careers. It was a night filled with wet passes, gigantic hits (Magoo is nasty), and sweet goals. The Cowboys started their season with veteran faceoff specialist Dusty Skater (Oakville, ON), soupy sniper Chunkai Bumbai (Burlington, ON), captain Michael the Magic (Georgetown, ON), glitch professional  Magoo (Halifax, NS) and were later joined by elite one-timer specialist Beanbag (Hamilton, ON).

The Cowboys played a total of 15 games. 13 regular season and 2 playoff matchups. Their records were as follows:

Regular Season: 8-3-2

Playoffs- 1-1

There were many exciting moments throughout the games played on Friday. Some of the highlights of the day were:

In game 2 of the Canadian Cowboys NHL 14 year, Magoo buries first Cowboy goal. Magic would gather 3 points in the lopsided 4-1 win.

In game 3, Magoo moved back to defense and crushed the opponents constantly. In Bumbai's 1st game on offense he buried his 1st Cowboy goal.

In game 4, the top line of Dusty Skater, Magic and Bumbai all gathered 2 points each in a 2-1 win.

In game 6, Drew lights the lamp twice. Magic with 1G 1A. Bumbai 2 apples.

In game 7, Beanbags debut with the team. Loses his first NHL 14 fight.

In game 8, Michael the Magic wins his first fight.

Game 9, Jerseys were changed to primarily black colours. After being shutout for 7 straight periods, Magic tickles the twine, twice. Also has 10 hits in the game. Dusty + Bumbai with 2 PTS each.  3-2 W.

Game 10, Magic is 1st to 10 points as a Canadian Cowboy. 2-1 WIN. Outshot opponents 34-10.

Game 12, 1st game against Frenchies. 3 fights end up happening at the SAME TIME! Big 2-1 OTW with huge Dusty Skater clutch goal.

Game 13, Dusty Skater first Cowboy to get a hat-trick. 10 career goals for him. Beanbag gets 1st career goal. 3 STARS - 3) Magic 2G 2A   2) Bumbai 1G 4A   1) Dusty 3G 2A  7-1 FINAL

Overall a very successful night for the Cowboys as they battle for each and every goal with currently very low rated players. 

YEEEEHAW COWBOYS! LETS KEEP WINNING!

*All stats posted are those discovered while Michael the Magic is participating. More games have been played without Magic.

Cowboys Begin Final 2013 Season Ahead of the Herd

It would seem that the Canadian Cowboys want to enter the 2014 year having made a name for themselves. After a July Elite League Title win - the ice in the Saddledome a portrait of their recent victory - the Cowboys went into the final 2013 season ready to finish the year with gusto. After their first few games of back and forth hockey, the boys decided it was time to make their country proud. One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Six. Six wins in a row. Seven. Eight. Nine. Nine in a row - the Cowboys seemed unstoppable. And for a while longer they were. Sixteen games later, the Cowboys were finally delivered their 3rd loss of the August 2013 season. Each member of the team played a pivotal role in these consecutive victories - each member except for their veteran right defenseman Jacques Bonjour (Montreal, QC). Unfortunately, Jacques has been on a leave of absence for a family emergency - his last known location was at "Pas D'internet" general hospital in Montreal.

"We obviously have high hopes that [Bonjour] will make a return for the onset of the 2014 year. It's been good to see some of the other guys step up defensively to take his place, though" commented the Canadian Cowboy coach. "We're definitely excited to have him back."

What Makes a Cowboy?

For those of you who visit regularly, and might be wondering what it takes to be a Canadian Cowboy, here is a list of some of the values a Cowboy lives by - some of the key phrases and lingo to get you one step closer to understanding the life of a Cowboy.

These are some of the values we bring to the ice with us every night. These are values that are applicable not only to those of us who represent the nation, but to those of you we represent by doing so. For the fans, for the players, for the game: this is who we are.

http://grammar.yourdictionary.com/slang/funny-cowboy-sayings.html

Slick Rick Not Feeling So Slick

Drew Perryman (Halifax, Nova Scotia) who is a highly skilled sniper for the Cowboys has recently lost his voice and has not been attending practice or games due to this new affliction. Slick Nips was a player that could be found on the ice most Fridays and Saturday nights and the odd weekday but he has not stepped a foot inside the Saddledome for quite some time. Many players on the Cowboys are quite worried about their snipers status.

"I've really missed feeding wet passes to that nuggethead," says Cowboy Tough-Guy Froggy Fresh.

"Nobody knows how to put that puck bar down as soupy as Slick can. Some utter words that he's glitching but I think it's just pure soup," reports dangle-specialist Bumbai.

"CHRISTMAS CRACKERS!" - yelled Big City Ken.

"Do you like my sword, sword, sword my diamond sword, sword, you cannot afford, afford, my diamond sword, sword.... sorry what's the question? Oh ya, I miss that guy," sang Jay and Dan Podcast.

The Canadian Cowboys are keeping their fingers crossed that Slick finds his voice again and steps foot on the ice before the end of the NHL 13 year and if not then, hopefully for the start of NHL 14. He is a big part of the Cowboys lethal offense and every player could use a bit more Slick Nips in their lives.

Cowboys Squirt Their Way To Elite League Championship

"Squirt, Squirt, Squirt, Squirt. Cow-boy-Squirt, Playoff-Champ-Squirt!"

In the closing months of the NHL 2013 year, the Canadian Cowboys were able to assemble what would be a dream-team-esque lineup to defeat 4 opponents en-route to becoming the July 2013 Elite League Champions.

In the dying hour of the July 2013 regular season, Zack Smith (Oakville, ON.) and Jacques Bonjour (Quebec, ON.) were able to squeak into Elite League Playoff Contension, setting the stage for a grand finale of epic proportions.

With Zack Smith (8G, 0A) winning an average of 84% of the draws, and participating in 8 of the eventual 13 Cowboy goals, the Canadian Cowboy offense was a force to be reckoned with. But Smith was not alone in his offensive forays, as left winger and long standing Captain Charlie Little (2G, 4A) and Toughguy-Turned-Turbo Calvin Cooke (2G, 8A) put up tally after tally in the assist column to add to the ambush that would be their second appearance and subsequent upheaval of the EASHL Elite League.

The Cowboys were privy to a much earned home ice advantage for game 1. 

Early in the first period, the Cowboys mounted their steeds and were on full attack. An unfortunate interference penalty taken by RW Froggy Fresh (Victorica, BC) haulted the Cowboys attack. Having been on their heels for 2:00, the steeds were itching to get back at it, and with 1:15 remaining in the first period of playoff hockey, the Cowboys were on the board. Zack Smith fired up his offensive guns, netting his first of the night with an incredible passing play set-up by Michael the Magic (Georgetown, ON.) and Froggy Fresh. The second period went scoreless thanks to incredible defensive play by Bumbai the Defender (Burlington, ON.) and Jacques Bonjour, holding the opponents to 2 shots. Unufortunately, midway through the third, the opposition were able to sneak between the all-star defensive pairing for a breakaway goal. With 6:00 remaining in the game, the Cowboys were all tied up.

The opponents were all too excited about their ability to tie the game, and took two subsequent slashing penalties against Michael the Magic while he performed some of his signature dance moves up the left wing boards. The Cowboys wouldn't let this opportunity pass them by, and netted a 5-on-3 goal with only 2 minutes remaining in the third. Zack Smith put up his second of the night, as he escaped several hits coming out of the corner deep in the offensive zone. The Cowboy fans were ecstatic, as their boys were heading out on the road for game number two of the Elite League Playoffs.

Maybe it was the intensity of their game 1 win. Maybe it was the pressure of being on the road. Or maybe, the Cowboys were becoming one of the hottest teams in the July 2013 playoffs faster than anyone knew. Regardless, it was an unfortunate evening for their opposition. Zack Smith put up the first Cowboy goal, which was the early beginning to the end for the opponents. Froggy Fresh was able to capitalize on their frustrations, netting the 2nd of four goals on the evening. The following two would come as a result of seemingly ridiculous goaltending choices on behalf of Bob Kostitsyn.

"I just thought I could pass it out to my defense and get a rush started. These guys are just...they were too good. And I'm an idiot" said the opposing goaltender. "They're too strong in every category. We didn't even score."

The Cowboys galloped home for game 3, where their opponents must have been certainly fearful coming into the SaddleDome against the red-hot Cowboys. Having come off a 4-0 win on the road, the Cowboys hoped to continue their shut-down defense - and they would. The first period was relatively back and forth; despite having out shot their opponents 10-1, the first period was scoreless.

"We went into the dressing room thinking we could come back strong. We had the zone, we had the heart, and we had the burn. We weren't about to drop it in game 3" said Captain Michael the Magic when asked about the game 3 scoreless period. "It was uncharacteristic given our previous two games but we were just feeling them out."

And feel them out they did. The Cowboys defense was unstoppable, holding the opponents to a mere 3 SOG for the rest of the game. Bumbai and Bonjour both tallied assists on 2 goals in the Cowboys eventual 2-0 win, and second consecutive shutout. The Cowboys were on their way to the Finals.

The final game was being played in the comfort of their own homes, which is exactly what the Cowboys wanted. Fans screaming, towels waving, hearts beating - they were ready to take it all.

The game began as an intense back and forth battle, but the Cowboys would draw first blood. Again, the pressure of the Cowboys led the opposing goaltender to make a poor choice, passing the puck right out to Michael the Magic's tape, leaving him a wide open net that he wasn't about to miss in game 4. 1-0 Cowboys. The first period ended with the Cowboys up and the opponents scoreless - a familiar theme.

"We just kept the puck moving up ice - we tried not to pass too much between us, Bonjour and I, until we were on offense. Smart pokes, smart passes, and a full team effort" commented Bumbai the Defender, speaking on behalf of himself and his All-Star defensive partner Jacques Bonjour who was unable to comment at the time, having no interpreter present.

An unfortunate second period goal by the opponents would snap the Cowboy shutout at 155:00 minutes, but this only served to lite the fire that it would take to seal the deal. The Cowboys would answer with 1...2...3....4. Four consecutive tallies, led by Froggy Fresh and Zack Smith, netting two each, to cap off the July 2013 Elite League Playoffs with a dark brown Cowboy hat.

"We were hoping to have the banner up in the arena for the final month of the 2013 year, and we did it. Our next goal is to do it again next month, and head into 2014 with an incredible record behind us. Each player proved that they had what it takes to get to the top, and I can't wait to see what the boys can do moving forward. YEEHAW" said Captain Little.

Regular season play commences Thursday night, for the final season of the 2013 year.

Chunkai Bumbai Placed on I.R. - Scheduled to return in 8-12 Weeks

A questionable hit sent Cowboy veteran RW Chunkai Bumbai careening into the boards Sunday evening. Bumbai was chasing a loose puck into the corner deep in the zone when a player from the opposing team checked Bumbai from behind, sending his body to the ice and sliding at top speed into the boards.

"I thought for sure I was paralyzed" recalls Bumbai Tuesday evening. "I got into the ambulance and I couldn't feel my legs - like a giant cast was already wrapped around them. But Randy (the Cowboy team Doctor since 2011-2012 season) took great care of me. I should be back in action sooner than anticipated, but I won't be skating for a while, that's for sure."

Although Bumbai was thankfully not paralyzed by his injury, he did sustain a broken ankle, along with a torn ligament (fibula), which is going to put him on the IR for a minimum of 8 weeks. Bumbai hopes to return as soon as possible.

"I'm going to let it rest - you know, do the right thing - that way I will be fresh and ready to hit the ice for the 2013-2014 season."

Bumbai is looking into insurance options for his continued pay with the Cowboys. Unfortunately, the EASHL only covers liability with regards to long-term injury. In order to Bumbai to successfully remain a paid player during his time on IR, his lawyer will have to prove that liability is with the negligence of the player who hit him.

"I think we have a strong case against the guy" said Bumbai's attorney Josh Zinga (Burlington, ON). "I mean the guy hit him from behind. It's this kind of thing that we need to address in order to prevent any more cowboys from falling off their saddles, short term or long."

Bumbai is eager to return to action, but will take the required time off as prescribed by the team Doctor.

"We'll get him back as soon as possible" ensures Randy. "We know how important he is to the Cowboys, but we also have to think long-term here. Look at Erik Karlsson. We hope to have Bumbai recover as quickly, but not everyone is so fortunate."

Action resumes with or without Bumbai Thursday night.

This Is Who We Are

Dear Fans, Dear Players, Dear Cowboys

Today's date: June 27th, 2013. This page is being made to honor the best, most prideful hockey team that ever skated the virtual arena. This team brings a new level of dedication, determination, and excitement to the EA Sports NHL franchise. This page will commemorate their trials and tribulations from the beginning of the EA Sports Skill Stick, debuting in NHL 2007, right through to the upcoming release of NHL 2014, and beyond. 

Lace up, skate hard, and enjoy!